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April 07, 2017

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   So it turns out a government really was interfering with our election: IT WAS OURS. One of the chief mischief-makers behind the surveillance and information leaks related to the Trump administration is Obama crony and serial liar, Susan Rice. According to multiple sources, she asked intelligence agencies to break with traditional policies and tell her the names of Trump associates who were (ahem) "accidentally" caught on surveillance tapes, as well as the content of their conversations. In light of these revealations, Rice - who just a few days ago pulled a Sgt. Schultz declaring she knew nothing about this - did an about face and now insists that she did nothing wrong, adding "I leaked nothing to nobody." Which, by the rules pertaining to the use of double negatives, means that she leaked everything to everybody.  No doubt with considerable help from Barack Obama, who spontaneously (why does that word keep coming up in association with Susan Rice?) changed the rules regarding inter-agency sharing of raw intelligence just before leaving office in order to ensure it would do as much damage to the incoming Trump administration as possible.
   When the story broke, the Fake News Networks immediately went into full cover up mode. ABC, NBC & CBS, didn't even bother to mention it. CNN declared the story to be false because Susan Rice's friends said so. But don't believe a word the Presstitutes tell you - both the unmasking of Trump's inner circle and subsequent leaking to the press, (to quote pervy Uncle Joe) are "a big F-ing deal." Check out Andrew McCarthy's insightful legal analysis of why Susan Rice's White House unmasking is a Watergate-style scandal that should land her in jail.
   When people think about Obama crony Susan Rice, they tend to remember her lying her rear end off about Benghazi, or declaring that military deserter Bowe Bergdahl served with "honor and distinction." But what we hope she's remembered for in the future will be a felony conviction for her role in the surveillance of Donald Trump and his team.

   Can I get a Hallelujah? RINO Mitch McConnell apparently borrowed Trump's balls yesterday and actually Nuked the Bastards. History was made when, for the first time since our nation became a nation, Schumer's Losers filibustered an exemplary Supreme Court Nominee because - and we've got plenty of political scientists and analysts to back us up on this - they're complete and total assholes. The only way around this epic act of douchebaggery was for Senate Republicans to invoke the so-called "nuclear option," which - disappointingly - did not require inviting Democrats to "a picnic and special surprise" in the remotest corner of Nevada while a gleeful Donald Trump punched their coordinates into his suitcase nuclear launch device. We would say that the Democrats are losing their freaking minds over this, only that ship sailed a long time ago. Gorsuch will be officially confirmed to the court by 7 PM tonight.
   We can only hope this is the start of a trend. We're up against some seriously evil forces and we need the current crop of GOP surrender monkeys to grow a spine. They cannot forget that everything a liberal says is always a lie, designed for the sole purpose of enhancing their power. And to deal with it, instead of reasoning with them, we must embrace the raw power of our raw power. Nuking the filibuster is just the start; we must jam every conservative policy we can conceive of right up their collective Schumer. While we have the power, we need to go at them fast and hard, with such a volume of conservative change that their defenses of SJW fussiness and media whining are overwhelmed in a righteous onslaught of right-wing awesomeness. Think of it as political dodgeball. You can dodge one ball pretty easily. But three balls at once? Six? A dozen? And now, instead of dodgeballs, imagine you are throwing wrenches. Yes America, let's get all Patches O'Houlihan on these simpering pinko femboys.

   In other news, Pres. Trump launched a missile attack on a Syrian airbase yesterday in response to Assad's despicable use of chemical weapons. Obama drew his famous red line. Then he promptly retreated to the golf course. By striking at this chemical weapons base, Trump has made that crystal clear that the era of Obama's foreign policy of appeasement and "pretty-please diplomacy" was over.  Also, in case you missed it, Dr. Ben Carson has uncovered a MASSIVE fraud at HUD to the tune of A HALF A TRILLION DOLLARS! Stay tuned as our "unqualified" brain surgeon and President Trump follow the money.
   Did you hear about the April Fool's Joke the Russians pulled on the DemoRats last Saturday? It was hysterical. And finally, for the most shocking news of the week...I'll give you all time to compose yourselves and orient yourselves squarely on your seats because this might put you on the floor. Ready? Barry Manilow announced that he's gay. Astounding! Who'd have thunk it?  Also, Rosie O'Donnell announced that she is fat.

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"Do not blame Caesar, blame the people of Rome who have so enthusiastically acclaimed and adored him and rejoiced in their loss of freedom and danced in his path and given him triumphal processions.

Blame the people who hail him when he speaks in the Forum of the "new wonderful good society" which shall now be Rome's, interpreted to mean "more money, more ease, more security, and more living fatly at the expense of the industrious".

- Marcus Tullius Cicero (106-43 BC)


"It does not take a majority to prevail - but an irate, tireless minority, keen on setting brushfires of freedom in the minds of men."

-- Samuel Adams

"Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction. We didn't pass it to our children in the bloodstream. It must be fought for, protected, and handed on for them to do the same, or one day we will spend our sunset years telling our children and our children's children what it was once like in the United States where men were free."

-- Ronald Reagan

"The American people will never knowingly adopt socialism, but under the name of liberalism, they will adopt every fragment of the socialist program, until one day America will be a socialist nation without ever knowing how it happened".

-- Norman Thomas
Socialist Candidate for President of the United States 1944