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July 14, 2017

Click To Skip To The 'toons

   Before getting into current events, a word about this weekly rant . As you might imagine, it takes a considerable amount of time to scour the net for the 'toons & articles, and put the whole thing together each week. Between mounting pressures at work, a new puppy in the house and a few personal items, it's going to be very challenging for me to spare that time in the next few months. I'll do my best, but don't be surprised if my Friday chronicle goes missing some weeks during that time. Now back to our regularly scheduled programming.
   When I sat down to summarize this week's (Fake) News stories, I found that Kurt Schlichter had already done a masterful job, so I present excerpts of it for your edification and amusement: This Time We Liberals Have Totally Got Trump. Wash. Rinse. Repeat. I almost didn't think it could happen, but things have gotten stupider. Somehow the media and their enablers decided that the worst thing in the world is for someone to be willing to hear negative information about a political opponent from a foreign government, which wasn't a bad thing until Trump's son tried it unsuccessfully. Apparently Putin's cunning spies work through chunky music industry gadflies and third-tier lawyers and don't actually have any dirt to give. Who knew? But hey, collusion or something. Whatever. 
   It's almost pointless to mention the actions of Hillary Clinton's cats paws regarding Paul Manafort and the Ukrainian government, or further back, Ted Kennedy's anti-Reagan conspiracy, because neither counts as this is all posturing and lies. If Hillary thought Lenin's embalmed corpse could have provided dirt on Trump, she'd have been in Red Square doing CPR. Let me break down how this is going to end. Liberals are going to gobble yet another Treason Viagra and the hot chick of success is gonna let them buy her a pricey dinner and then smile and say "Let's just be friends." Again. I would almost feel sorry for them if they weren't a bunch of evil, aspiring fascists who want to turn all of America into Evergreen College.
   Oh, meanwhile in Iraq, which never mattered to Democrats, the people who were slicing the heads off dudes, tossing gays off buildings, and selling women into sex slavery, have been annihilated. This happened under the tender loving care of Mad Dog Mattis, the guy who Trump put in command of our armies and who refocused our military away from making it more comfortable for people who don't understand that a penis makes you male to killing our civilization's enemies. You might think that the annihilation of ISIS in Iraq would merit a mention, but no. See, in the middle of a political campaign, a campaign was willing to hear out someone promising negative information about an opponent, which, as we all now know, is the worst thing in the history of ever and is treason or something because that's a useful narrative right this minute. CNN is all over one of these stories. Guess which one. Go on. Guess.
   I feel stupider watching CNN, so I don't. In fact, a lot of people aren't watching it. CNN is getting beaten out by Yogi Bear, a cartoon which provides more reliable information than Fredo Cuomo and the rest generate. In fact, Yogi Bear has had to retract exponentially fewer stories than CNN. Let me say that again. A cartoon bear whose entire life focus is stealing picnic baskets from tourists is a more popular and more accurate source of information than Cable News Network.
   Do you think this latest nonsense is going to stop Trump, by which I mean the people who support him? Do you think the normal people in America are thinking "Gosh, a campaign tried to get negative information about its opponent? I'm shocked and stunned and emotionally ruined. I don't know where to turn or what to do. I guess I better support a bunch of liberal fascists who want to take my money and my power and my guns and who boo God." I don't think I'm going to give up my freedom to honor your bogus principle du jour. It won't work. Nobody's getting arrested, nobody's getting impeached. You liberals suck and you're going to lose. Again.
   Here's a few more quick hits. Evidence is mounting that the Russian Lawyer that met with Don Jr. is a Dem plant and the whole thing was a setup - stay tuned. Things aren't going well for Hillary Clinton these days. She's been reduced to shilling T-shirts - which makes an even more pathetic figure of her, but a target rich environment for the rest of us. As the spineless GOP "leadership" prepares to sell out the nation on Obamacare, here's a simple solution to the healthcare situation that makes so much sense, it'll never happen. When CrapNN declared war against the internet meme makers, they had no idea the talent and genius of their opponents. Here are the two absolute best ones I've seen, guaranteed to make you crack up. Finally, you'll LOVE the Story Behind This Veteran's Recent Trip to the White House. It'll make you proud to be an American just knowing that we have such true heroes.


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"Do not blame Caesar, blame the people of Rome who have so enthusiastically acclaimed and adored him and rejoiced in their loss of freedom and danced in his path and given him triumphal processions.

Blame the people who hail him when he speaks in the Forum of the "new wonderful good society" which shall now be Rome's, interpreted to mean "more money, more ease, more security, and more living fatly at the expense of the industrious".

- Marcus Tullius Cicero (106-43 BC)


"It does not take a majority to prevail - but an irate, tireless minority, keen on setting brushfires of freedom in the minds of men."

-- Samuel Adams

"Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction. We didn't pass it to our children in the bloodstream. It must be fought for, protected, and handed on for them to do the same, or one day we will spend our sunset years telling our children and our children's children what it was once like in the United States where men were free."

-- Ronald Reagan

"The American people will never knowingly adopt socialism, but under the name of liberalism, they will adopt every fragment of the socialist program, until one day America will be a socialist nation without ever knowing how it happened".

-- Norman Thomas
Socialist Candidate for President of the United States 1944